Sunday, September 23, 2012

On my own

Yeah. So. This whole maintain and oh, well, now lose what you've gained while, ha ha, "maintaining" thing is not working. 

I can't do this on my own. Balrhaoijpoiqrewr0iujq34.

Oh, I know HOW to do it. I just don't do it. Well, I do it, and then I don't and then I do and then I don't. Y'know? Fuckity fuck fuck.

Dieting is not rocket science. I know pretty much exactly how many calories, carbs, protein, etc that I need to consume every day. And on a good day, I do it. The problem is that there are too many days I just don't do it. If you've ever dieted, you know. The cheating. The crap food that I would never have eaten Before now is irresistible to me. What. The. Fuck. 

So, I'm thinking maybe I should just go full-on Medifast again? It bums me out to type that and I am not all that certain I can swing it. I mean, my problem isn't that I don't know what to eat, it's that I go off and off and off. Not sure what would keep me from doing the same if I go back on Medifast. Maybe the idea that I've spent dough on it? Or that I am doing it quite publicly? Ay yi yi. 

Anyone who has been in my shoes, feel free to tell me what to do. And if you know me at all, I rarely ask what to do on account of my extreme self-sufficiency so you know I must really want some insights if I'm actually asking for 'em.

Oh, but please don't tell me not to diet. I do need to lose weight again. That is just that. Plus if I am dieting, I will wear and take pictures of cute thrifted clothing outfits again. And isn't that the important thing?


  1. Damnit. You know I think you're amazing and wonderful and all things positive-adjectivey. And I have no advice (LOL, just look at me!). But I wish you well and I will send fierce, positive energy into the universe that you get the answer you need.

  2. First of all, don't give up. Weight loss is incredibly hard, it is a life long process, you will have ups and downs, take notice of each success and each failure they can teach you something, pay attention and learn from them. I don't really know much about Medifast, but I can tell you what I've learned from Weight Watchers. The weekly meeting and weigh-in provides accountability that keeps me honest. I had to try many different meetings before I found a leader that I really clicked with, and someone who could be supportive while calling me on any of my self sabotage b.s. It doesn't have to be a WW meeting, but you do need a support system of people who have first hand understanding of long term weight loss and dealing with food issues. The next key for me has been discovering exercise. I was never an athletic type of person, and I always said "i hate the gym", but then I found a small fitness center that fit who I am and it's been critical to maintaining weight loss, in fact it was the difference between hovering 10 pounds away from my goal weight for 3 years, and then finally surpassing my goal. The benefits of exercise are not just physical, it has played a huge role in my mood, coping with stress without turning to food, and building a better relationship with my body. Have you found an exercise routine that you like? I started with some videos at home before I was confident to go to a gym. Along the way, I also learned some rather strange tips for fighting you have the after-dinner munchies? paint your nails, it's hard to snack with wet nail polish. Organizing a drawer or cleaning out my purse is sometimes enough to take my mind off eating long enough for a craving to subside. Even these little things, can add up to big results over the long run. Someone asked me: "If you broke a plate from your china cabinet, would you then go and throw all the other plates out?" Of course not! Don't let a set back, send you back to zero. Sorry this was so long! Good Luck to you....can't wait to see your next blog post!