Thursday, October 13, 2011

The ladies

Hear ye hear ye. I would like discuss a rather sensitive subject about the ladies! If this kind of thing makes you a wee bit squeamy, that makes two of us. Hence the use of the term "the ladies" to discuss the ladies. Also, I appear to be writing in british today. Tally ho!

First, some facts:
  • Being a lady of ample proportions, I have a generous supply of ladies.
  • Having lost a goodly amount of weight (MANY STONES, PEOPLE), the ladies have also lost a goodly amount of weight (maybe even an entire stone!).
  • Yet, the skin remains.
  • Indeed.
I find that the result of the aforementioned facts is that my outfits spend an undue amount of attention accommodating and arranging the ladies. And, I do feel like they are always a "thing" in my outfits. It is not to my liking.

However, I am not fancy in the way of "lifting" this or "reducing" that. Mostly because: If I am lucky and get to live to be ancient, it is entirely likely that I will be spending too damn much time under the care of physicians...I don't want to use up my share now. I don't want to jinx it. Also, it costs money. So, I'd rather not.

So, what to do, what to do. Spend lots of money on a Very Dear Brassiere (or two)? (I made that up.) (There should be a brassiere company called that though, right?) Is that it? Or is there a skin shrinking cream of some sort? OR WHAT?

Meanwhile, thrifted:
  • Lined linen khaki skirt with brown stitching and brown grosgrain ribbon belt $5
  • Pink t-shirt with rosettes $4
  • Pale green cardigan with embroidered flowers all over it $7 (I can't believe I haven't worn this before...have I?)
  • Chunky brown boots $7
  • Bangles $4
Not thrifted: Nothing!

What I would change about this outfit now that I've seen the photo:
  • I can't tell if it's me or not, but I'm not digging the way the sweater accentuates the ladies (maybe, really, I just need more better brassieres)
  • Umm, I forgot jewelry other than bracelets. Maybe simple is good, but I like the jingle jangle when I stroll.
  • I look weirdly girly here. I am not this sweet on the inside
Total outfit cost: $27

PS. Maybe I blawg once a week now. Maybe I don't. I don't know. Maybe I blawg whenever the fuck I feel like it.

PPS. I hope I take a picture of today's outfit. It's cute in a parade-like-way.


  1. I have heard amazing stories of the transformative powers of the right bra - so I'd look into that if I were you. I finally spent a couple hours trying them on and now have ones I like that I don't fuss with all day - for me that counts as a win.

    By the way there is a store in Erie PA that specializes in fittings called (I shit you not) Braserie, Dearie! I bet there is something even better, and even more quirkily named in your town.

  2. What Heather said. Seriously, I'm poor as a church mouse, but I don't go cheap on bras. Your entire body looks better with a well-fitting bra and it's nice not to fuss with it during the day.
    I want to see today's outfit!!

  3. Here in L.A. we have a store called Wizard of Bras. Thought you might like to know that. Yes, high quality bras can be a real paradigm shift. Worth the extra dough in my opinion. Me personally, I'm a Chantelle loyalist, but if they're not right for you I'm sure you'll find something wonderful. Oh, and I like you're idea of the shrinking cream.

  4. Oh, how I long to find a Very Dear Brassiere! If you find the place to buy something suitable up here in the bay area, please share! Otherwise maybe it's worth a field trip to the south lands to visit the Wizard of Bras!

  5. Right then. So, The Ladies are often a focus of mine as well in terms of how to not make them front and center. Also having a lot of Ladies, I do to find the right bra, but I also most often just say, "Fuck it!" I am at a point in my life where I don't give a shit about the world's issues with my Ladies. Whether it's fashion, business, religion, the world has something to say about Ladies from their "issues" with womanhood, and I don't give a shit about what their agenda is. My Ladies are my magnificent self, and I don't have time anymore to worry about others' crap. So whatever. Love 'em or not, I don't give a shit. They're mine and they're magnificent.

  6. My ladies are also a 'big issue', and I've been fortunate to have some great guidance on the subject.

    I agree that brassieres are an area to splurge on, and that a collection of non-minimizing bras is a goal worth working toward - your whole wardrobe will look better on you!

    Here in SF my favorite places are the downtown Nordstrom & Macy's, and Les Cent Culottes on Polk Street. They all have a great selection for busty girls, sales fairly regularly, and have salespeople who'll be happy to help you get the right fit, and notify you of upcoming sales, etc.